Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Only Men Can Be Pimps!!!

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Ok... this is a whaaaaaaaaaale of an issue. And you can try to combat me on this issue, and I will take into account your points, but I will put money on my stance in a court of law. Just so I can jog my memory from the many times I've had this debate:
1. women do it to themselves. women hate on girls who looks like whores.
2. (main argument) women have the pussy power. unfair advantage.
3. societal discourse hasn't converted in 2010 years, NONE of us will be alive to see it convert completely: women aren't supposed to sleep around. we've come a long way in 100, but it's still not there. as long as religion is in place, casual sex will never become a norm... norms must transform in this order "causal sex is forbidden" --> "casual sex is bad, but not condemned" --> "casual sex is bad, but not condemned for men"-->"casual sex is bad for women, but not condemned" ---> "alright!....fuck it!" (LOL).

TBC 3/10/10

Lady MySpace Pix

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This is the post where I go iynn on girls' MySpace pix. Everything from trickery to sluttery, I'm going iyyyn. Some girls really think their pix look class when it's just trashy. Some girls think they look good, when really the angles are tooooo flattering. Fuck that. These broads NEED to be put on blast. And I got the gun.

TBD 3/10/10

Caveman Craft

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This is a post where I will rant about men and how most of them are fucking idiots in public. Far too many times, I go to clubs/bars and see guys initiate a conversation grabbing a girl by the arm or grinding on a lady with no invite or just walking up to her and saying something STUPID (I don't even know what they say, but I know it's fucking stupid!). And you know what, it kills it for guys like me who are literally just trying to dance. I never go out thinking I'm gonna smash. Really. That's not me. My homies have Game. That's them, they can do it. Not me. But when I go out, fuck yeah I'm tryna dance with a hottie. Shieeeeeeet. But those scumbags kill it. Absolutely kill it. And so... I'm going to murder them on this post and hope it hits them from here.

TBD 3/10/10

The Whore's Uniform

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If you're familiar with Dave Chappelle's stand-up, then you know about the "whore's uniform." My favorite comedians are the ones that make a point when they're making fun. The "whore's uniform" alludes to a very valid point that I'm sure several comedians have touched on in the past, but it is still prevalent today: how a girl dresses should dictate who a girl is. Now, I'm not saying that a girl can't be stylish if the style is risque. BUT, every good knows where the line between fashionable and trashy is drawn. Even on Halloween, where the line becomes drunkenly blurred, a girl can be provocative & sexy without throwing up a white flag ("I give it up") and flashing a green light ("go get her").

If you're a female and you're thinking, "johnny, why don't you tell me where this line is?", then I respond to you "Gurl, I was going to. Don't be a skanky AND impatient. Those are the 2 tell-tale signs of a whore."
-Example 1: High Skirts
-Example 2: Low-cut tops (more applicable to big C's and above)
-Example 3: Pasties


-Example 4: Fishnets

Now that we've determined what the whore's uniform looks like, we must then discuss what the whore's uniform dictates. Or more blatantly, what the uniform says about you. Plain and simple, it says that you are "D.T.F." There's no sophisticated, politically correct way to say it. You look like you're down to f*ck. You've heard it time and time again, "men are simple." Some of us think on a higher plateau, some of us are more intellectually developed, but when it comes to relationships, the common denominator is Simplicity. Our needs, desires, and intentions may differ, but we all think of it in simple terms. And you know this. You should know this. Any woman who has ever complained about men should know this. Mainly, because you complain about the same sh*t: why are men such dogs? Blame it on evolution, baby. You get the perks of a better mind, we get the pitfalls of a dirty mind. Your brains develop faster, our brains stay on the pussy platform. Not much development after we learn to pipe. So knowing you're dealing with this rudimentary being, why the hell would you dress in a way that supported the idea that you're easy? If my thesis was "This girl is D.T.F.," your outfit would be the concrete detail... actually, your entire would be a large portion of my essay right next to your promiscuous MySpace pictures.

Oh, man... don't even get me started on MySpace pictures (See Lady MySpace pix for that rant). In relation to this, your uniform in those pictures directly reflect how men are going to treat you. Your pictures are saying, "I dress like this because I act like that." So as men, we're going to hit you up trying to beat the cheeks. If your pix really aren't that bad, then most guys will be a little more tactful in their approach. Now, I know most guys use the Caveman Craft, but a high majority will be more suave with their approach. But if your pix DO depict yourself as a sex fiend, then a majority of the comments/messages will be as simple as we are: "wuddup ma! wen u gon lemme hit it?!" And that's how they should be, you nasty nasty girl! Ha! There's only one way to low key prevent that, and even THAT, will not help: a boyfriend. Why am I still getting all these damn messages if I'm "In A Relationship"? Well Jersey Whore, it's because your pictures are sooooo bad, most guys think you are so DTF you would cheat on your man. Now I'm all for women's lib, but if your man is okay with those pictures being up, something is wrong with him. And if he has had that fight with you, and you still keep those pictures up, don't be surprised when you see his Inbox and catch him having textual intercourse. You basically dared him, nay pushed him, to do it. He should cheat on you. He will cheat on you. You're sexy, yes, so he will coming running back to you. But unless you chance your devious ways, it will continue to happen as long as your billboards are up. Ya dig?!

In summation, the way you dress is the way you advertise yourself. And if you're promoting for porn, don't be surprised if guys do everything short of wave their dick at you. In fact, you shouldn't even be allowed to call the cops if a guy actually DOES pull his dick on you. You like dick. You know you like dick. We ALL know you like dick. Embrace it like your fellow porn stars.

"Don't fight it, just ride it." - Johnny Rockit

Monday, March 8, 2010

The Terse: Flowers

I'm trying to find a nice little set of flowers for a special someone. I say, oh, 1800flowers has a nice arrangement, let me see how much. $80. 80f*ck!ng dollars! So I shop around a little more online and these bouquets all go for $50 and up! Then I thought to myself, why am I going to pay that much to have someone deliver flowers when they're just going to die in a few days anyway? And more importantly, why pay that much when they're just 10 bucks on the side of the freeway?!

Special girls, like special flowers. Roses are NOT special flowers. Which sucks because the special flowers are EXPENSIVE. LOL. I have some plotting to do. Metaphorically and literally. One day, I need to grow my own flowers.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Batman vs. Superman

This was a post I made... thought I'd share it on the blog since it's been a year? Lol. It touches on it in a very concise yet loaded statement on the argument:

LOL! it's social commentary, kat. people favor Batman because he's an actual HUMAN. he wasn't bit by a spider. he didn't slip in magic ooze. and he's NOT an alien. and even though the legacy of Batman says that you have to be a billionaire in order to be a human super hero, the fact is... he's a human. just like you and me. he bleeds, he cries, he shits.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Dispensaries

http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-dispensaries-i,0,5658093.htmlstory

They are all over the city. I could go on for days about how marijuana should be legal, but I'm tired. Lol. Just check it out. Imagine, all of these locations and how much money they make. My ex knew someone who ran one and said they made about $10,000 a week. That might be a bit embellished because he was tryna get in her pants, but let's think about this... when she would go, she would spend about $60. I'd be willing to bet that that's about average for a person's visit. Let's say it's a slow shop, and they get 20 people that day. These are probably conservative estimates, mind you. That's $8,400/week. Damn... maybe that guy wasn't exaggerating. Fine. I'm okay with saying that a dispensary pulls in 10 g's a week. You're talking about half a million a year from ONE location. According to this article, there are 260 in the Greater L.A. area. That's $130,000,000 coming off weed from this region alone!!! Put these businesses all across the nation and tax the shit out of the operation... it's a crop that would be totally ruled by America. We would own and end a whole lot of problems. I'm just saying.